Im gonna echo what peter said. As someone who has overcome depression, anxiety, had a dysfunctional family growing up, survived been run down by a car and even managed to get cured from having Cancer, i try my very best to count my blessings. I fail to do so many times and find myself throwing the odd hissy fit over pointless shite, but i always try and put things into perspective.
I'm grateful for being alive as ive cheated death a few times. Im grateful for my family who are now like a proper family compared to when i was a kid. Im grateful for my friends, grateful for food, water, having a roof over my head etc. Im the healthiest ive ever been in my life, both mentally, physically, emotionally and internally, which is odd considering all the stuff i just mentioned.
Here's what i did in regards to depression/anxiety. I have no idea if this will help any of you, but i really hope it does.
1) Learn about your psychology and the condition as much as you can. There's tons of resources and books out there on amazon, youtube etc.
2) There's many different anxiety disorders - find out which one you have and confront the fear slowly and gradually, until you become desensitized to it. If you try and confront the fear in one big go, it may overwhelm you and do more harm than good. Slowly and gradually worked for me.
3) Work on your inner world. You mindset etc. You need to find out what deep rooted beliefs you have inside. You beliefs direct everything in your psychology
beliefs >>>> thoughts >>>>emotions >>>>>behaviour
You can do this by either doing self help, which is hard as there is a lot of shite out there, but some of it is actually really good. OR go through a proper Cognitive behavioral therapist. Their job is to retrain your thoughts and beliefs, which in turn will help relieve the internal emotional distress. They'll also expose you to the stimuli causing you anxiety so that you can confront the fear and hopefully overcome it.
3) Therapy - find a therapist that you click with. Honestly, there's a ton of therapist out there and some of them are fucking mad themselves. You need to find one that resonates with you. Don't be the person who goes to therapy once, gets a shite therapist and then rationalizes that therapy doesn't work. Keep going through different therapists until you find one that is perfect for you.
4) Medication - I didn't take any medication or drugs. However, i understand that some people's anxiety and depression is so sever, that they can't take the first step. In that case speak to your doctor. Maybe you want to start on some medication and as your emotions stabilize, you can get into therapy and address the problem and then come of the meds. Don't depend on medication solely though as i think that is masking the real problem underneath.
5) Rebuild your self esteem and identity
This was the best way to overcome depression for me. Again your therapist can help you with this. There are some good self help stuff out there. But i want to stress that some of these self help people are a bit woo woo and wont resonate with you at all. If this area interest you, find someone who you resonate with. If you are completely anti self help, go with the therapist. I say both personally.
6) Surround yourself with as much positivity as you can
I'm not gonna say always be happy or you should be positive 100% of the time, because thats just bullshit. Sometimes you get down days and you feel like shite. The point is though, absorb as much positive stuff as you can via books, audio books, courses, friends, family, hobbies, loved ones etc. Do this to the point where your more often in a positive mood than a negative mood. Learn how to flush negative moods from your system. For me, gratefulness and perspective play a big part, similar to what peter was saying. Find what works for you.
7) Keep a diary. Write down all your thoughts every day no matter how negative, positive, weird or odd they may be. You need to know what's going on inside your mind, so you can address it. Your therapist will also recommend this.
8) Meditation - I meditate for 10 minutes every day. It helps me identify whats going on in my mind and what emotions are in my body. Most of us try to run away from uncomfortable emotions and thoughts. Meditation forces you to confront them internally. This is similar to mindfulness.
9) Surround yourself with good people. Surround yourself with good friends, loved ones and family. If there's anyone who brings you down or is toxic in your life. Cut them or at the very least limit contact with them. People around you influence how you are.
10) Build your emotional intelligence - learn about emotions, how they work and how you can generate positive emotions more often than negative emotions.
11) Make peace with your past so it won't screw you up in the present.
Resources
I know finding a therapist can be a pain and the doctors at your local practice will probably try and brush you off with a prescription, so check the following site out. I haven't used them personally, but ive heard good things.
https://www.betterhelp.com/
Its an online therapy site, where you therapist is in continous contact with you via messages and has scheduled phone calls with you every week. Bit pricey, but if you can afford it, why not. Go with a proper therapist though.
Books
Six Pillars of Self Esteem - Nathaniel Branden. (Great book for building your self esteem, learning about your psychology etc)
The Feeling Good Handbook by Dr David Burns - (Good for learning about psychology, depression, anxiety and treatment)
The science and practice of CBT - David M Clark (Amazing book on CBT from therapists, with cases, treatment, suggestions, etc)
The untethered Soul - cant remember the author, but the book was damn good. Good for mindfulness.
I have no idea if this helped any of you out, but i hope it did. Mental health is tough and honestly i think all of us have our own internal battles which we fight. Its an ongoing process and one which we're going to have to deal with many more times throughout our lives. Hopefully this post points you in the right direction. It worked for me, so i hope it works for some of you.
Much love.