Mental Health Dojo

Very interesting that he said that because I think I've read that in one of my Tao books that mentioned a cycle of 7 years where your personaliy changes. Everything comes and goes in cycles. Our sun, our planet, our body, everything seems to follow a certain pattern. But after all, everything is connected to everything.
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To everyone: I have read some of your experiences and I wanted to share a method that have helped me through tough times and many others as well. This particular method is very easy for everyone to practice and it can be more effective than you think.

I highly, highy, recommend listening to Wim Hof and his methods. Both the Breathing technique and the Cold Showers.
What you can do is that you could start with the cold showers. Most people have a shower with cold water in their home.

The colder the better. You can shower in warm water first, then switch to cold water. Shower for 2 minutes in cold water. The intense breathing starts naturally. First you're probably going to get very uncomfortable but this will change over time.
I'd say after 14 days you will start to feel more used to it.
Avoid showering your head at the beginning. Keep the water under chin level.
You could go for, let say, warm water, then 1 minute cold water, then warm water again, then cold water for 1 minute, and finish with a warm shower. If that is too much, recude it to 1 minute total instead of 2.

This I can guarantee will improve your sleep and you will feel mentally much more stable than before you took the shower.
The Wim Hof breathing technique is also very effective. But I know that with anxiety this breathing can be difficult.
That's the reason I think the showers are the best starting point because you naturally start to breathe in a similar way when taking a cold shower. You can find more about the breathing by listening to Wim.

This may sound boring to you, or you rather not doing it. And I understand that, but there's a lot going on in the brain when you're getting exposed to something uncomfortable like a cold shower. Wim Hof talks about this in detail. He has trained, and cured people with severe mental illness, making them so strong and resistant to cold that they could walk up a mountain during winter time only dressed in shorts and boots. People who wanted to kill themselves got their lifes saved by Wim's methods and made a 180-turn.

I have been taking cold showers for a long time and will comtinue to do so. I have never been as mentally stable as I am right now. I know other things as well that help a lot. But this one I think is the easiest and most accessable method for everyone to do. I also do the breathing. I haven't done these thing in a while, not every day. But I will start doing it again and also combine this with lifting weights.

When I first took the cold showers I screamed; "ooh, ough, oh god, Aaaa , AAAAAHHH!!", or something along those lines.
But now I just stand there like it's nothing for two full minutes. Sometimes longer. And I feel great.

* The Wim Hof method is backed by science and literally anybody with working lungs can practice his methods.
- the science has proved the W.H-method extremely effective and that the human body is capable of much more than previously believed by mainstream science.
* It can boost your testosterone levels, which is very good if you're a man. But women benefit from cold showers too.
* It lowers high blood preassure. I know many men in their 50s that have stopped using their medicine and therefore also
didn't have to deal with the side effect of these pills.
* It effectively boosts your immune system, prevents many negative health conditions, and you can save your money because a cold shower doesn't cost as much as pills or visits to a hospital.
* It improves your circulation, like a lot. You will probably not sweat as much as you did before. At least I didn't.
- it helps the blood to circulate even in the tiniest blood vessles.
* You will sleep like a baby. It helps with sleeping problems, better than pills and no side effects.
* It helpes the nutrients to get into the muscles, and all over the body where it is needed.
* It helps your muscles to recover after a workout session. Less muscle pain.
* It reduces pain of all kinds.
* Highly effective against depression. It helps (forces) the mind to focus on the present moment.
- it's because the body needs to focus on the cold and the cold ´triggers´ certain brain functions like, one example is the so called the ´blue spot´ in the brain (if I remembered this correctly). The brain literally can create multiple chemicals such as DMT on its own. And that includes the ´happy hormones´ because when I look at myself in the mirror after a cold shower I see a big smile plastered on my face, and I feel good. This feeling can actually last very long.
* Brain Plasticity: Your brain can actually change. It can we wired in a ´less good´ way, but this can easly be changed. When a person for example takes cold showers or starts to work out lifting weights, his/her brain starts to rewire and work differently in a more beneficial way.

and much, much, more...
(Combine this with a healthy diet, lifting some weights, spending time in nature (or where there is greenery), and you're on a different life path, for sure.)

* Notice, do not take cold showers if you feel sick (having shiverrs etc.) or if you have the flu. But otherwise. There is nothing dangerous with the cold. But I highly recommend that as a beginner you finish with a warm showers. Otherwise you can get a little shiverry afterwards.
But that mostly disappear after a while. And another notice, don't over do it. When you feel it's enough, it's enough.
Last note; Doing this without any type of medication probably gives the best results but it shouldn't be anywhere near dangerous if you do take some medication, did anyone die of showers? If you're unsure ask your doctor or go by your gut feeling.

With this information I hope that I helped and / or inspired at least some people here to try it out and I hope you will feel better of this -- and that you find more ways to improve your health in order to become the (real) best version of you.

I know, but Just do it! (y)"A cold shower a day keeps the doctor away" - Wim Hof
Yes, totally makes sense that my uncle got that thought from Daoism. He's read pretty much every philosophical book in existence. He's one of the people who own a complete collection of Nietzsche's works (and have actually read all of them) and I know he's read some Zhuangzi and Laozi as well. I gotta ask him about it, next time I talk to him.
 
Yes, totally makes sense that my uncle got that thought from Daoism. He's read pretty much every philosophical book in existence. He's one of the people who own a complete collection of Nietzsche's works (and have actually read all of them) and I know he's read some Zhuangzi and Laozi as well. I gotta ask him about it, next time I talk to him.
That is awesome, very interesting. 🙂 I'd like to hear what he had to say about it. You two most likely know more about that subject than I do. I think it's good to read, to think, to feel and to expand awareness into wider perspectives of life and our existence. It's healthy and it takes us out of our ´bubble´. It's a good way to escape the ´screens´ that seductively ´says´ ´loook at meee´. Screen addiction is a problem to many. Most unknowing to the problems that it causes.

To Everyone here: I encourage you to find a quiet place outside where there is greenery like a forest.. or a park. Just sit there alone for 1-2 hours. Bring something small to eat, or something warm to drink. Just be there. We need to re-connect to nature.
You're not some animal that should be locked into a cage. You're a free sovereign human being.
Anyone that claims the opposite can shove it up their 🍑
 
Dojo family,

The end may be in sight for our current predicament. Every single thing has been done on our end.

Our closing vanished twice, from October 26th to November 12th, then to unknown status again due to title issues(deceased parents home and one of the heirs died too).

I received word yesterday from my lender that they now have a clear title and were waiting on the deed to be sent by the lawyer. The date has been set back for the 12th again.

We were sent to final approval, which I should hear back from today(they have a very short window to make this stick in a week).

Once I get that, we can leave this nightmare behind. Mom has improved, but not by very much.

Her demeanor has changed in recent days, because despite her fussing about the "kids being loud" or whatnot, the reality that she's going to go back to that lonely home very soon has started to hit.

I feel bad for her, but not as much as one might in a normal relationship, considering everything she's done.
 
Been binging a lot of Bob Ross after seeing episodes of his show streamed on twitch. Very relaxing and nice to fall asleep to in my new bed here. A bit sad to learn the exact circumstances in which he passed away, but even so his work and his attitude are(were?) still inspiring...just seems a lot of it isn’t exactly applicable to the way I do digital art.

At least it got me to finally do something after almost two months now.

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In other news, I keep having weird dreams - almost feel as scary as nightmares even though they are fairly innocuous. One had my cpap leaking all over the floor, and another had my sister’s cat peeing all over it. Guess it’s because of all the work we did to pull up my uncle’s old carpet and put new tiling in.
 
Has anyone struggled with severe burn-out from work that really took a toll on your wellbeing?

I've been working at a job for two years now and its the best job in the world with some of the funniest people around with whom I've made great friendships. I couldn't be happier.

However, the specific department I work for is quite understaffed at the moment, and 3 out of 5 of my colleagues do not pull their weight. Not to sound my own horn, but without me as the only full-timer of the group swooping in on a weekend or evening to work as overtime, stuff never gets done because these 3 individuals will use any excuse to get out of doing anything. I could be travelling into work to do a massive high priority task one week, and these 3 would be assigned something small and easy to do from the comfort of their couch, and they can't even manage that, leaving me to finish it up for them as overtime or else it never gets done.

From the first UK lockdown in March to the end of October I have spent the majority of my weekends and evenings mopping up work while they complain about having 'internet problems' or 'phone problems' every week leaving everything to myself and others (honestly, their reasons are so pathetic I'm surprised they haven't used 'I can't work right now because I need to have a wank' as an excuse at this rate). This, coupled with the second UK lockdown and an exhausting family member who likes to ring me up daily to treat me like their therapist, I finally cracked about three weeks ago because my anxiety went through the roof. What's strange is I felt fine (relaxed even) when I was overworking myself, it actually distracted me from a lot of the coronavirus gloom and doom. But I suspect I may have bottled things up without knowing it and now my body is reacting.

I remember previously going through similar situations like these where I burned myself out to such an extent that I'd feel sick with anxiety for a while, specifically, final exams when doing my Undergraduate and stressful jobs where I was very unhappy in the past. In all these situations, I remember what helped me tremendously was throwing myself into the gym for a good few months to sweat it all out. I started a routine yesterday and will now be on the road to healing. I will also refrain from mopping up tasks like I did before, if our department receives a tonne of complaints as a result of these 3 people feeling exhausted after sending 1-5 emails a day, then so be it.
 
Doesn’t seem like a similar position but I think that I and probably many others can relate to feeling overworked, especially for very little compensation. I wasn’t full time, rather I would have wanted full time with all the benefits, but at my last job it felt like they just kept stringing me along with close to full time hours, but offering no health insurance nor any kind of set schedule from week to week. But I can understand more when it seemed my father’s job always waited for him to show up to put everything on him, or my brother in law would be the one manager required to work every single Sunday while the others got it off.

Taking 3 months off early this year as a leave of absence was a bit of a vacation, despite actually getting covid for most of it, but going back it was a lot worse than I could have imagined. Granted, I have not enjoyed any job I have had, so there’s that, and I’m not in the best shape to begin with, compounded with wearing a mask and whatever unknown after effects covid is having on my body, the last few months were hell, especially with the full time maintenance guys taking vacations whenever they wanted and having me cover for both despite the risk of not qualifying for medicaid if I went over so many hours. Finding out we’d be moving was kind of a miracle, but it came with the news that the guy I’d train as my replacement was probably going to get full time almost right away, not having already given 110% like I did for over 2 years by then. Quite frankly they can go fuck themselves and I’m glad they don’t have any stores out west here.

The past two months have been hectic for reasons other than work but it’s finally quieting down...but the thing is happening I feel like I’m using it as an excuse still to not look for work yet. A bit apprehensive I’ll just fall into the same trap again of trying to overly impress at first and ending up just getting used. And with parents who either believe “oh just work harder and it’ll pay off after 30 years” or “you do your best regardless” it’s hard to get in the mindset of only putting in so much and not killing myself - especially when I get reprimanded for taking it easy and more often than not managers just sit around chit chatting or doing “computer work”.

I once had a dream wherein I was at the job before last, in the store parking lot, water flooded up to my ankles at least and being told to mop it all up, which is pretty crazy but not totally out of line of what they could have asked me to do. And just last night I had a dream that this past job called me in, all the way from New Mexico to New Hampshire, and I actually went even knowing I was not technically working there anymore. Seems insane but when you get into the mindset of the average lowest wrung worker you can kind of understand the brainwashing that goes on that would make this seem logical. My other sister is with a guy who is nice and unassuming enough but basically puts down anything to go into a job on his few days off at the drop of a hat, and he has not received any kind of promotion or raise in years. I have to wonder how much he realizes he’s just being trampled on and not getting anywhere.

Unrelated, sort of, or related? In my dream last night was one associate I had a crush on. Also happened to be a friend I told I’d take the time to meet in person before I moved, but didn’t. So she was there, bakery girl, the one good part of my work days even if it was brief, and I don’t recall exactly what was said between us in the dream but apparently she wanted me to catch her. Or hug her? It was pretty confusing. Thing is, I’ve had a bad track record of thinking girls are more into me than they actually are(opposite of the strange stereotype that guys are oblivious), and some have taken my admissions better than others, and things with her and I seemed ok at first, but eventually she quit. Probably not to do with me specifically but as I understand it she was pretty popular with a lot of guys in the store and it inadvertently caused some unnecessary drama. And being an employee she would likely have to put on some kind of act or bubbly persona not to cause more trouble for anyone or herself, knowing how others would react. Just something I’ve been thinking where many of our jobs take up way too much of our lives, just seems really unhealthy to live where you work more than your own home or family.
 
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Received final forms last night. Tomorrow afternoon, we sign to open a new chapter in our life in our first home. Thanks for the support and listening ear, Dojo family.

I'll be picking up my PS5 in celebration after, but it'll be some time before I'm able to hook it up--but I'll be sure and try both Shenmue HD and Shenmue III first!
 
Sorry for not responding lately, but i'm so glad that everyone is able to comfortably open up here. It's so refreshing to read.

I've been OK, although I do struggle with melancholy a lot more lately. I've started my therapy for my social anxiety, but i've had to cancel every other meeting due to a lack of privacy in my house and no wi-fi at work. My therapist is very nice, although 3 meetings in, i'm worried that i'm not making much progress and i'm talking about worries I didn't think about before. The last meeting, I was asked to come up with some questions I would like other people to answer. Those answers would give me comfort when I am struggling. I hope they do.

My manager has been so supportive at work with my difficulties, so I am grateful for that. Sometimes I feel sad because at the moment i'm anxious to talk to people which can affect my work. I try to take it one step at a time and write a script of bullet points if i'm nervous. I'm learning new things which is good, but I still feel like the odd one out at times.

A lot of my worries come from that I am someone who suffered arrested development. I grew up too slowly and am playing catch up with everyone else. I still live at home with my parents at the age of 35 (although I hope to finally be in a position to buy a house next year if the market slows down) and I never had a proper relationship until 3 years ago. I am also incredibly gentle hearted. Paradoxiacally, I can be rather nihilistic too, so I get very confused with my thoughts.

Speaking of my relationship, although we haven't had a face chat for 6 months, I sent my girlfriend a care package to Japan of British sweets. Her joy at getting a pack of Polo's made me feel so happy. I send her pictures of my dogs and even though we don't have a lot to talk about at the moment, i'm happy that we are keeping momentum going. We have been together for almost 3 years and have only spent 6 months of them together in person.

I notice lately that gentle things make me cry in a good way. One of them recently was the works of Dick Bruna (the creator of Miffy the bunny rabbit). One day I felt sad, so I put a Miffy cartoon on. Miffy was so kind to everybody that I just ended up almost crying, because it was the first time in ages I saw something so selfless and kind without any cynicism. It's bizarre. So I feel like I have two personalities; one of a young child who lives simple, gentle things and one of a pretentious, cynical git who watches and listens to avant-garde art. In such a complicated, crazy world, I love simple things. I went to Utrecht for an avant garde music festival and it was in the same city as the Miffy museum. One moment, i'd be drinking 9% beers listening to incredible Japanese acid rock at 1am and the next, i'd be welling up with joy looking at Dick Bruna's personal items and presents from fans of Miffy all over the world.

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Also, after a year on a waiting list, i'm finally in a position to be tested for autism. The questionnaire nearly made me cry, because it asks questions which are incredibly personal or make me sad such as "are you clumsy?" and "do you get upset when things aren't ordered in a way you like?" I have to give the questionnaire to someone who knew me since birth which means my parents. This means I have to tell them that I am depressed and I am seeking help for anxiety and autism. They know i've dabbled with depression in the past, but not autism. I know it will be OK, but i'm too scared to have the conversation. Partly because I don't want to know the answers to many of these questions.

On a bad day I think "I am a broken person", but other days I tell myself that I am special, because I am true to myself even if I am not confident enough to share that with other people. I wish I could say "i'm not OK and I want to cry" and not feel awkward about it.

I'm sorry for my stream of consciousness and rambling. In a way it's just nice to not think and to write <3
 
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I highly, highy, recommend listening to Wim Hof and his methods. Both the Breathing technique and the Cold Showers.
What you can do is that you could start with the cold showers. Most people have a shower with cold water in their home.
This sounds great! However, my body is odd in that I can deal with cold in some places and struggle with others. I can have cold water on my arms and legs up to my knees, but everything in the middle is a no-no. This is something I really want to try as i'm sure once you get over the initial shock, you get used to it. I won't be able to do it with the current shower (my family would go ape shit), but if i'm in a hotel or something, it's something i'd like to try.

It would be hard to not want to have a warm bath afterwards though..!
 
Sorry for not responding lately, but i'm so glad that everyone is able to comfortably open up here. It's so refreshing to read.

I've been OK, although I do struggle with melancholy a lot more lately. I've started my therapy for my social anxiety, but i've had to cancel every other meeting due to a lack of privacy in my house and no wi-fi at work. My therapist is very nice, although 3 meetings in, i'm worried that i'm not making much progress and i'm talking about worries I didn't think about before. The last meeting, I was asked to come up with some questions I would like other people to answer. Those answers would give me comfort when I am struggling. I hope they do.

My manager has been so supportive at work with my difficulties, so I am grateful for that. Sometimes I feel sad because at the moment i'm anxious to talk to people which can affect my work. I try to take it one step at a time and write a script of bullet points if i'm nervous. I'm learning new things which is good, but I still feel like the odd one out at times.

A lot of my worries come from that I am someone who suffered arrested development. I grew up too slowly and am playing catch up with everyone else. I still live at home with my parents at the age of 35 (although I hope to finally be in a position to buy a house next year if the market slows down) and I never had a proper relationship until 3 years ago. I am also incredibly gentle hearted. Paradoxiacally, I can be rather nihilistic too, so I get very confused with my thoughts.

Speaking of my relationship, although we haven't had a face chat for 6 months, I sent my girlfriend a care package to Japan of British sweets. Her joy at getting a pack of Polo's made me feel so happy. I send her pictures of my dogs and even though we don't have a lot to talk about at the moment, i'm happy that we are keeping momentum going. We have been together for almost 3 years and have only spent 6 months of them together in person.

I notice lately that gentle things make me cry in a good way. One of them recently was the works of Dick Bruna (the creator of Miffy the bunny rabbit). One day I felt sad, so I put a Miffy cartoon on. Miffy was so kind to everybody that I just ended up almost crying, because it was the first time in ages I saw something so selfless and kind without any cynicism. It's bizarre. So I feel like I have two personalities; one of a young child who lives simple, gentle things and one of a pretentious, cynical git who watches and listens to avant-garde art. In such a complicated, crazy world, I love simple things. I went to Utrecht for an avant garde music festival and it was in the same city as the Miffy museum. One moment, i'd be drinking 9% beers listening to incredible Japanese acid rock at 1am and the next, i'd be welling up with joy looking at Dick Bruna's personal items and presents from fans of Miffy all over the world.

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Also, after a year on a waiting list, i'm finally in a position to be tested for autism. The questionnaire nearly made me cry, because it asks questions which are incredibly personal or make me sad such as "are you clumsy?" and "do you get upset when things aren't ordered in a way you like?" I have to give the questionnaire to someone who knew me since birth which means my parents. This means I have to tell them that I am depressed and I am seeking help for anxiety and autism. They know i've dabbled with depression in the past, but not autism. I know it will be OK, but i'm too scared to have the conversation. Partly because I don't want to know the answers to many of these questions.

On a bad day I think "I am a broken person", but other days I tell myself that I am special, because I am true to myself even if I am not confident enough to share that with other people. I wish I could say "i'm not OK and I want to cry" and not feel awkward about it.

I'm sorry for my stream of consciousness and rambling. In a way it's just nice to not think and to write <3
I’m really sorry to hear about what your going through, although it’s really nice to see that you are able to get help and have people that can be supportive.

I’m not really good at discussing topics like this, but I just wanted to say how much I relate to your post. I have always felt like I’m lagging behind everyone else in life, as if I’m a kid and an 80 year-old at the same time. It’s confusing, since I don’t really know where I should be at this point in my life. I still live at home, which is ok, but at times I feel like I’m stuck. A year ago I found out that I am autistic, and it was like my whole life suddenly made sense. For a few months, I actually felt like I knew myself for the first time, but it has since gone downhill, where I feel like I’m worthless and there is no hope of me improving. I have yet to be diagnosed, so this causes me some anxiety. With the pandemic going on right now, my anxiety is at an all-time high. I suddenly have a hard time even going out to town. Work is 10 times more exhausting, but there’s nothing I can do about that. :/

I also relate to what you said about watching Miffy. Suddenly I get emotional when I watch things that are looked at as ‘childish’ by others around me. I really like the muppets, and I find the original muppet show comforting. It gives me a break from the more serious aspects of life right now....

Coming to terms with being autistic and having anxiety and depression is a hard pill to swallow, since I went through most of my life thinking that I’m confident and happy, that everyone else is the problem, just to realize that it’s been a charade. I’m glad I know what the issues are, since now I can actually do something about it. I’m looking into getting diagnosed but it is really daunting. I hope that the autism assessment will help you feel more sure of yourself. Some days it feels like a roller coaster of emotions, especially now with everything going on.

Thanks for sharing... It’s comforting to read about experiences similar to mine. :) I hope your situation improves soon!
 
You're doing great, @bcdcdude; it may be tricky and hard to answer that questionnaire, but knowing that if you complete it, it may lead on a road to making you feel more comfortable with everyday life and more-positive, I say is reason enough to answer it.

I think you have it in you to complete it, but you have to find the will to do so, deep-inside of you; perhaps facing these answers will change your perspective and it will make the process more-positive for you? (I don't know you personally, so you may not feel this way at all lol; I'm simply hypothesizing :))

Either way, I think that it is fantastic news (that you are on the path to discovery) and good things will come of it! :D
 
This sounds great! However, my body is odd in that I can deal with cold in some places and struggle with others. I can have cold water on my arms and legs up to my knees, but everything in the middle is a no-no. This is something I really want to try as i'm sure once you get over the initial shock, you get used to it. I won't be able to do it with the current shower (my family would go ape shit), but if i'm in a hotel or something, it's something i'd like to try.

It would be hard to not want to have a warm bath afterwards though..!
I hope you find ways on your life journey to find inner peace and happiness. Just hang in there. There are multiple ways in every persons life to find happiness. We just have to find out who we really are and what we really want.
What we really want is often connected to what we really love to do.

Once, I said to a young man in his 20's who was severly depressed, he expressed such a helplessness; -´remember there's multiple solutions for every problem in your life, you just need to find out what those solutions are´. Today he is a fully functional, a changed man. He remembered what I said.

Never give up and never compare yourself to anyone else. There isn't a specific way to live life, there are many ways. (y)
Having a girlfriend is ok, having a wife is ok, having multiple friends is ok, but not having any of that is also totally ok.
I love people but I also love spending time alone doing one of my one hundred hobbies. I can literally be completely alone for a month and never feel lonely.

..How? It's how we relate to it all that matters. That is the key.

And also that we refuse to let others define who we are as individuals. Any person can build up his character, or rather show his/her ´real self´ by practicing self-respect and by going their own way in life. Doing what they love to do. There's tremendous personal strength in individuals that acknowledges their true abilities and self-worth . To not be limited to what others think of you and to not be limited by your own illusions about yourself. I used to care what others thought of me but that is becoming less and less important by the day. It's almost non-existent. It's all illusions and the most confident looking person you see on the street could potentially be the most insecure one.

About the cold, yeah same thing for me. The thing is that I got used to it over time. I still need to learn how to deal with the cold on my hands and feet but I'm gettin more tolerant. I used to have problems with blood circulation in my wrists (carpel tunnel, I guess), it was terrible. But I changed diet, started to lift weights, got rid of gluten, took cold showers and later I realised that, somewhere along the way that problem just disappeared, and I had it for years.

If cold showers are problematic, maybe try to lift weights? Pushups is good too. Like 10 or 20 per day depending on how many you can do and how much of your body weight you lift. I mean 5 is better than nothing. Then maybe do that x3.
I knew a guy who made a progress video where he did pushups every day and it's amazing how different he looked after months of doing it daily.
Any workout is fantastic because it increases the testosterone which is important for mens health and wellbeing. High testosterone also makes a man feel more driven and confident.
 
Dojo family,

We are in our new home. It is a cluttered mess of boxes, with still more to go once we make a trip down to Mom's(its a drive and UHauls are not cheap for a longer ride), but it is amazing here.

Closing was very smooth, but our ability to move was severely hurt by rain(of which there is more coming today). We're going to be spending time getting new furniture over the next week. It'll probably be at least 2 weeks before it begins to resemble anything.

Mom is, as expected, a mess. Despite all she did to make it miserable, the reality has now set in for her. I'm not there to be her errand boy, fetching alcohol or other random stuff she used us for.

Her problems are the same, but the gut punch that came with the children leaving and that house going back to silent and alone has left her bereft(though she won't admit it, it shows in the extra phone calls, etc)

A good bit of stuff of ours is still there to get, but once that is gone and there's no reason to expect us again, I admit I do worry about what that will do to her, but only moderately. If only she was a better person.
 
Thank you all for your kind words. I will use this as a holding reply so you know I haven't ignored you. Such comments deserve a proper response.

@Valascaziel - congratulations on your move. I'm sorry it hasn't been as smooth as it could've been, but hopefully the hard part is now over :)
 
What do you do when you don’t have passion for anything anymore? When you can’t even fake passion for the things you genuinely love? When nothing interests you whatsoever?

When you can’t find reason for anything anymore?

Part of me wants to check myself into a hospital. I feel so far gone lately. I don’t know what I’m doing anymore and I can’t find reason for anything.
 
Are Videogames not fulfilling that part of your passion, Dan? Or is it on a more human-conscious level, IE emotions, relationships, etc.?
 
What do you do when you don’t have passion for anything anymore? When you can’t even fake passion for the things you genuinely love? When nothing interests you whatsoever?

When you can’t find reason for anything anymore?

Part of me wants to check myself into a hospital. I feel so far gone lately. I don’t know what I’m doing anymore and I can’t find reason for anything.
Hopefully it's periodical. People have passions but I think overall what drives them is happiness and you need to find something that makes you happy.

My lowest point I felt very similar. I would wake up and instead of doing work I'll sleep or gorge on junk food without a care in the world that I would get fired. I was so low that even keep a roof over the head of my wife and children wasn't a concern.

I did end up quitting my job and the fresh start at somewhere new got my mojo back a bit. The place sucked but I was so busy and spent so much time travelling I didn't have time to dwell.
 
I don't know. Nothing interests me anymore. I can't find motivation or reason to do anything. Work bores me. Video games don't take me away from it anymore. I can barely sit through a film anymore. Everything just seems shit to me and I find myself more and more questioning "what's the point?"

I just don't care anymore about anything and am having trouble finding a reason to be. I'm stuck in a rut and I don't know how to get out and change life. But even then I think "will that truly make me happy even if I did that or will I grow to be the same way I am now?"

I don't know. This year has been rough and I guess its just at that low point of "why bother?"
 
I don’t feel so great about turning older these days but today was not bad. Real lazy, lots of Yakuza 7 so that’s good. Kind of odd to have it in such warm weather. At least it got kind of decently cool by sundown - we’ve had a fire pit of sorts going every other day to get rid of some overgrown brush my uncle never took care of, so it’s been nice to stay out late. The highlight though has been hearing from my friend overseas.5BB633B6-B978-45C7-9FA2-A9ECD0D24FA3.jpeg
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A bit worrying about something she told me to do with money but we’re both hoping for better days to come I guess. At least, things don’t seem as bad with covid there.
 
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